If you don't know what the title refers to, or if you think that
the biggest news last night was the release of
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood
Prince, feel free to read on, if you wish.
If you do know the title reference, then be warned,
there are possible spoilers below. I'm going to explain things to
the mundane, then discuss the shows. If you haven't seen them yet,
you might not want to read any further. Though, really, there isn't
much here you couldn't figure out on your own.
Back in my youth, there was a rule that at most one Science
Fiction story could be shown on television at one time. Thus
The Twilight Zone never overlapped with Star Trek.
OK, there were a few shows which tried to cash in, like Lost in
Space, Men into Space, and even My Favorite
Martian, but they weren't really science fiction. (Men
into Space was more like "Blue Angels With Rockets", a
techno-thriller kind of film. I loved it, but it wasn't SF.)
Post Star Trek, we got a bit more SF on TV: the dreck
Space: 1999, the really-cheesy but great back-story
Battlestar Galactica, and, when the local PBS station could
afford it, Dr. Who. Then came Star Trek: Next
Generation, followed by Deep Space Nine, Babylon
V, Buffy, etc.
But science fiction on TV really arrived with the SciFi channel.
I know, they run a bunch of grade C movie stuff, but they also run SciFi
Friday, which features Stargate SG-1, Stargate
Atlantis, and Battlestar Galactica (Mark II, with
glowing-backbone female Cylons). These shows are generally as well
written as an average Star Trek episode, usually pay more
attention to continuity, and have a whole lot bigger budget.
So last night they kicked off the new season for all three
shows. SciFi has a strange release schedule: the shows will go on
for a couple of months, then they'll show reruns until January, when
they'll show the rest of the season. In Britain I understand that
the series will start in September and show straight through, so
though the UK won't see these shows for a few weeks, by November
they'll be ahead of us. Hence the spoiler warnings.
For the past few years a friend of mine and I have been
discussing the shows by email. Generally I give a few thoughts on
each episode, crack a few jokes, and go on, while he gives a
reasoned review of the episode, including how it fits in with his
worldview.
Pity you won't get that here, you just get me cracking the
jokes. But OK, if he wants to respond, he can, in the comments
below.
For what it's worth, last year I liked SG-1 best, followed by
Battlestar, and then Atlantis. I can go into the reasons if you
like, but that's my prejudice as I look at these shows. This year,
though, SG-1 has major cast changes, so my opinions might
change.
OK, if you're looking for the possible spoilers, they're just
below the line. Don't say I didn't warn you.
- Stargate SG-1:
- Beau Bridges: (who looks much worse than his Dad did at
the same age) tries to be a tough guy. But he's not, so far, he's
just moaning about how good the SGC people are, which means he can't
yell at them. That never stopped Hammond. This guy needs some
character development. How come the President answers HIS phone
calls? And who is #1 on his speed-dial?
- Claudia Black: (sorry, I don't know the new character
names, yet, so we'll have to go with real names): I liked her
character in the tryout last year, and she'll be OK as Daniel's love
interest and gadfly. However, she should get a new dress designer.
The current outfit just emphasizes the fact that there's not all
that much up there. Also (and more importantly?), as portrayed this
week, her character is basically stupid. She actually believes
what people tell her about devices they've stolen, and she can't
think more than 30 seconds into the future.
- Other Farscape refugee: This is the star of the show?
We'll see when they give us a longer-than-10-second opening. Looks
too much like Daniel, as Claudia pointed out, and tries to act too
much like Jack, without the essential post-MacGyver cool factor.
Also, I'm not sure from the flashbacks why he got the Congressional
Medal of Honor, and not any of the other X-302/303 pilots that were
holding off Anubis. Wasn't he just doing his job, like all the
rest?
- Daniel: Thank God he lost the beard. His rather
intimate relationship with Claudia could be fun. It was last year,
anyway.
- Teal'c: Hopefully he'll get more to do than shoot
bullets at walls and try to hold up collapsing ceilings. He's
supposed to have some conflict with
- Lou Gossett Jr.: Why is he slumming here? OK, Isaac
Hayes did it last year, but that was only for a couple of shows and
he's basically got no career anyway. What possesses a Movie Star to
appear on a cable SF series? They'd better do something good with
his character.
- Jack: He plays chess? He's good at chess?
- Carter: Tapping is on post-maternity leave, supposed
to be back full-time in a few weeks.
- Villains: Don't have any yet, so it's hard to tell.
<Wholesale Speculation>
It is interesting that Merlin is an Ancient. This means that the
Ancients were backing the Celts at about the same time that the Asgard
were backing the Norse. This didn't lead to conflicts? Could this
explain the rise of the Goa'uld? Battles among the four races. Come to
think of it, this could explain why we never see the Furlings. The big
four fought amongst themselves, and the Furlings were wiped out.
And why do the Nox hide? Are they hiding from the Goa'uld? Maybe
they're hiding from the Asgard.
And who created that plague that wiped out the corporal Ancients? Could
it be, ..., I don't know, ... maybe ... the Asgard? You'll notice the
Asgard are the only ones of the big four still running around the
universe.
OK, probably not.
</Wholesale Speculation>
- Stargate Atlantis:
- Speaking of Asgard, we're corrupting one here. By the time this
season is through, Hermiod (bad choice of name, unless they're going
to get Preparation-H as a sponsor) is going to be chucking nukes
into stars just to watch the pretty light-show. And why does he
curse under his breath? Does anyone on the Daedalus
understand ancient Norse? Come on, it's not like Daniel Jackson is
there.
- It would have been interesting to have Dueling Colonels ("I get
to draw and quarter Sheppard." "No, I get to draw and quarter
Sheppard.") but I guess that would get old fast so they had to get
rid of one. Interestingly they kept the one who seems easier to get
along with. Maybe he's a pal of Beau Bridges.
- Plot: Did the Wraith really believe that explosion?
They didn't even come down to check. And does this mean that the
Atlantis team has to stay hidden for the rest of the season? After
all, once they blow up another Wraith ship all of the hive will be
back.
- Battlestar Galactica:
- I don't know. But then, I never know about this series.
I'm guessing that Adama is going to be out of commission for a few more
weeks, so we'll have some conflict between Tigh's sense that he's unfit
for command and his wife's pushing him to take control. We've also got
to reunite the cast, which is now spread over half the galaxy.
- I see how the Cylons were able to win the first time: Our heroes cable
together a network of three computers, on a presumably shielded
spacecraft, and a Cylon virus is able to break it down in minutes. The
virus must have been left in the computer's OS, just waiting for a
chance to do mischief. And no ones gone through the code for the last
20 years. Or else, all the programmers are secret Cylons.
- I keep thinking about writing an SG-1/Galactica crossover.
Except that Sam (or even Rodney) would figure it all out in about 5
minutes, and Jack (or Farscape Guy) would blow the Cylons to
smithereens a few seconds later.
Stay tuned next week, boys and girls
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